You've come to the right place!
I'm clearly a boss in flirting -
To kick start this blog for 2015, I'll be teaching you the art of FLIRTING!
Because we all need a bit of deciphering when it comes to the ones that turn our brains into mush, here's a few tips of DOs and DEFINITELY DOODILY DIDDLY DONTS!
By my google definitions, flirting means to 'behave as though sexually attracted to someone, but playfully rather than with serious intentions.'
So you could simple this down to -
'I really really really like you but I'm going to pretend not to and to act all coyly through playful jokes and banter but secretly when you turn away or look at something else I'm going to glance adoringly at you SO HARD that you'll feel it bore holes like lasers into your head as I try to memorise each and every fibre of hair, sweat, and pores on your beautiful majestic face." -
But OF COURSE none of us want to say that just in case our crush doesn't catch our flirtations and rejects us in the most horrific soul crushing way. But we've been blessed by the people, generations, who have gone before us and made all the mistakes that we now don't have to!
'Do I? He is alright, I guess his cheekbones could cut marble, but I bet every guy could do that. His hair is so ruff-able too...but it reminds me of this one guy's...'
- to a healthy, -
'Yup. You. I like you and whatever you're doing to everything of yours'
Don't: Deny, Deny, Deny.
None of these are going to get you anywhere. Denying will just take you on a detour that isn't that scenic. Like through the country side where you think it'll clear your head but in reality, it's just got a lot of cows and cow manure and mud and allergy-inducing stuff in the air, then you realise you're knee deep in manure.
'Fess up, cos you're the only one who isn't buying it here.
Do: Tell Your BFF.
BUT! Do not go around telling absolutely everyone like it's the next apocalyptic event. Only tell a few of your best friends; One or two at max. The more people know, the more chance your crush will find out before you want them to or are even ready to put the moves on them.
Don't: Make your BFF Guess.
Avoid this by just letting them know, and avoiding the possible chance of a disappointed look on their face as they don't approve of your weird obsession with Mr. Hiteverybranchandleafontheuglytree and tries her best to support you without vomiting or making a sassy comment about him.
Do: Go out to Activities thatYou Both Attend
If you're into the same Fandoms (Or sports teams? That's a fandom, right?), be seen with something of that on you. A Harry Potter jersey with the Hufflepuff House has gotten me compliments and comments. Maybe not really the ones that I want, but it's noticeable for someone who also likes Harry Potter, and has a friend that asks you 'What the heck is a Hufflepuff?'.
Double Don't: Let Your Friend Stalk Online
Doodly Diddly Don't: Stalk Him Online Yourself
[Jokes we've all done it, and continue to do it regardless of the consequences. We're monsters]
Do: Act Normal!
My personal take on the whole Be Yourself is to not be ashamed or to hide the things that you like because you fear that the person you like or are trying to impress might think it's weird. I, for one, absolutely LOVE reading books. I could rant and rave about books. If I was interested in a sporty guy who said proudly, 'I haven't read a book since high school!' I wouldn't try to dismiss the fact that I liked reading books. I might throw a book at his head, though.
What I'm trying to say is, when he pops around the corner, don't suddenly spring into your best pose and pout those duck lips and flaunt yourself just to catch his attention. Don't try to only talk about the things he likes or be interested in them just to seem better to him. Be who you are, like what you like, and respect what other people like too.
Don't: Be Obvious, Idiot.
Do: Stare A Little
Don't: Stare A Lot
Do: Give Indication! A SIGN!
Don't: Over Indicate
Don't: Smile Like You're In Pain
Do: Talk Casually
Don't: Talk Like You're A Donkey
Do: Share The Conversation
Don't: Come In Like A Wrecking Ball
Do: Make Some Form of Physical Contact
Don't: Touch And Go
Doodily Diddly Don't: Repeatedly Touch
~ CONGRATULATIONS! ~
It is now a simple Rinse, Repeat cycle until either of THREE options happen:
1. He is interested, and returns your interest by flirting back.
2. He is not interested in you, and rejects you.
3. He is in a relationship already and/or gay.
If in the case of 2 - It's okay. Everything, your very being, is probably in complete and utter agony right now.
Remember, it's not the end of the world. There are PLENTY of other guys in the world, and you have the rest of your life. Do you remember all your past crushes? Haven't you thought 'Wow, what was wrong in my life to like him?' Then you will probably think about this same guy in a couple of months, or years.